not ready to test

[reicheru]

Ok, I'm in a bit of a bind. My sensei wants me to test for 2-dan in July, but I know I'm really not ready for it and won't be by July. This is not just a case of me being modest or humble about my kendo skills -- on the contrary, I've never been known for modesty and I generally have a fairly realistic sense of my abilities. I felt ok about getting shodan last summer, but I have become really busy in the past year and no longer attend practices as regularly as I did before the shodan grading. The other students who did shodan with me last year have been going to practices almost daily for the past year, so they're now a lot more qualified than me.

I pointed this out to my sensei and insisted that I'm simply not nidan level, but he kept repeating that I'd be fine. Normally if someone posted something like this, I'd probably say "trust your sensei, he wouldn't be suggesting you do this unless he thought you were qualified." But I don't think that's true in this case. I'm the first gaijin my dojo has ever had, and I think the sensei sees me as somewhat of a status symbol -- and I'm sure he'd love to be able to tell people that they brought an American from ikkyu to nidan in less than 2 years (I'm probably leaving in August, so this is probably my last chance to test here). He even insinuated that the judging panel would go easy on me because I'm a gaijin ("kawaii kara") so I have nothing to worry about. That comment really hurt! Now even if I did pass the grading, I'd feel like a fraud. But I'm not sure sensei is going to take no for an answer. So my question is whether I should...

1. Go to the grading and try my hardest not to pass
2. Go to the grading and risk obtaining a rank that I know I don't deserve
3. Obsinately inform my sensei that I'm NOT doing it, period, even if that strains my relationship with the club
4. Sign up for the grading and suddenly come down with a cold or sprain my ankle that morning
5. Never go back to the dojo and take up sumo instead

Or do any of you have suggestions about how I can convince my sensei that I don't want to do this, and still remain on good terms with the kenyuukai???

-Rachel

[slidercrank]

There are 2 more months until July. Start attending practice daily or as regularly as you used to. Shodan to Nidan is not a huge gap. If your basic is sound and your sensei good, it's not unrealistic to see some improvement in 2 months of hard practice. Maybe your sensei thinks that would be all you need to pass Nidan. Maybe he's using the Nidan test as a bait to lure you back for more practices before you leave.

Just listen to your sensei, start practicing hard, give it all you have at the grading, and then leave Japan knowing you have done the best you can.

Good luck.

[AlexM]

This is how my sensei urged someone to go take an examination: "You may think you are underserving of x grade but you are essentially unqualified to know whether that's true or not. Go do it and they'll (the judging panel) tell you."

Go to the grading, if you pass you pass, if you fail you fail, it's up to the panel to make these decisions not you (that sounds a bit harsh). It's out of your hands really.

I was told that when you get a certain rank you have to prove that you deserved it.... afterwards. So if you get nidan now rather than later just prove that you deserved it by continuing to practice kendo. Think of it this way: your ni dan grading will actually show you achieved shodan.

[Neil Gendzwill]

Option 6: do what your sensei asks, attend the grading, make your best effort both in preparation and at the grading. If you pass, try to live up to the rank they have given you.

[PhilMcLaughlin]

Go for it

Grading is embu rather than shiai - demonstrate the best technique you have and use the time between now and then to polish as much as you can

good luck !

[itazura]

You’re in a bit of a difficult spot. Your sensei will not be accustomed to being told no by a student. Frankly no is not an answer that will fly very well without good reason.

You can try the injury feign but it better be convincing. I would just be busy that day with an appointment that is mandatory in some way. Obligation is great.

As far as judging your level yourself and if you are ready that’s always a big question. Do you have good basics? If so you’ll rise to the level of nidan in a short period even if you feel that isn’t quite your level now. You can take the test and pretend it never happened. Who will know? It’s about what you are comfortable with.

Here’s something I pulled from a web site. This is what the AJKF said about testing skills at a seminar.

A person who is eligible for Sho-dan shall have learned Kendo basics and his/her skills are in a sufficient level.

A person who is eligible for 2-dan shall have acquired Kendo basics and his/her skills are in a satisfactory level

In the end I would say take the test and rise to the level.

[Confound]

Reicheru,

No matter how hard you bomb the exam, you're a gaijin woman. Your sensei has a point, you'll pass, unless you fall flat on your butt and start to cry. Believe me. I've seen people (mostly girls in my club) who can't even hold a shinai properly who passed their exams. I wouldn't have passed them, but the grading panel must have either been blind, or extraordinarily lenient.

That said, do what you think is best. I'm in the opposite situation. I will have to wait two bloody years to test for ni-dan, but I practice 8 times a week, I'm more than ready for the exam, but, because of Canada's rules, and the fact that my shodan was in November, not July, I won't be testing for that grade before I leave. My senseis seem to expect a return trip in November for grading, but that's highly unlikely.

c
<gripe>
ps- May I add that I am thoroughly sick of hearing about ALTs who 'do kendou' but only go to practice three or four times in their tenure on the Jet programme, or they go for a while, then get 'too busy'. If you're going to do kendo, do kendo. There's no bloody excuse while you're here on JET, which is practically living off the avails of the Japanese government. It's hardly a job, more like babysitting.
</gripe>

[titus]

Hey Confound,

Random question, where is your location in Japan, relatively? I mean, north, south, etc? And what do you do for a living?

I was just wondering because it sounded somewhere like you lived in a rural, extra-urban area, and I was wondering why you don't live somewhere more interesting like Tokyo, Kyoto, Osaka?

No point for the question, just curious.

[itazura]

Unfortunately Confound is quite right on this point and it happens all too often. Japan has been asked by many countries not to do this kind of thing but at a local level it’s still happening.

It is really not a favor for the person taking the test if they are not at that level. They return home only to find that people with a much lower rank are much more skilled than them. I seen it cause frustration for the person and they even end up quitting sometimes.

[kendomushi]

I've been eligible to test for 4-dan since Nov of 99. I went the firs time I could. I knew I wouldn't pass, but I wanted to see how different the level was from 3-dan. I had heard its very different. I did ok, more like I was in a shiai than a shinsa though and didn't pass.
Since then, my sensei asks me every time if I want to test. Up until this year, I have not felt ready and have appologized to sensei saying that even if he thinks I can do it, the fact that I believe I can't dooms me to failure. He accepted my point of view as valid.
This year though, I feel I do have a good chance, though no guarantee and so I will test.
Go with your gut feelings on this.

[Neil Gendzwill]

Originally posted by kendomushi
I've been eligible to test for 4-dan since Nov of 99. I went the firs time I could. I knew I wouldn't pass, but I wanted to see how different the level was from 3-dan. I had heard its very different.
It's a lot different, at least here in Canada. At 4 dan they are expecting a much different type of kendo than before. Also the judges are a lot harsher as 4 dan is considered to be a sort of junior instructor level. The pass rate drops dramatically from earlier tests.

[Confound]

Kendomushi is right.

Until July 28th, I will be in Miyagi prefecture, Sendai City. For those whose geography isn't up to par, that's 2 hours or so North of Tokyo via high speed train (on the Tohouku honsen shinkansen line). Feel free to come harass me, unless you're in any way related to kurukuru.

Sendai is actually a wonderful city, it's one of Japan's 12 largest (though near the bottom of the list). The city actually benefitted from being bombed to the ground during WWII, because the city administration re-builot the downtown core with beautiful wide, tree-lined streets. It doesn't hold a candle to Tokyo's diversity, or Osaka's night life, but if you want a safe place to live, with greenery and the comforts of big city life, without the hassles of crowded trains and tangled subway lines, then Sendai is a great city. I happen to be rather fond of it.

My school, however, is on the very outskirts of the city, in what is colloquially known as 'the yakuza belt'. I'm here on the JET programme, which means 'living off the avails of the Japanese government'. (How many times have I explained why I'm in Japan since I joined this forum?)

c

[reicheru]

It sounds like general consesus is that I take the test, but I do fear that Confound and Itazura are right and that there's a reasonable chance I'd end up with a grade I don't deserve simply because of who I am and where I am, and I know I'd feel horrible about that. As for attending practices more regularly in the next 2 months to prepare for the test, well, that's tricky. This may sound like blasphemy to many people on this list, but the truth is that kendo is NOT my life, nor do I particularly wish it to become so. For several months before the grading last year, I was able to put certain other parts of my life on hold or cancel activities to go to practices more often, but as my time in this town is now limited I'd rather be doing things that I won't be able to do back home and seeing people I won't be able to see when I leave this town. And kendo doesn't fit into that category. I go to practices when I can, and would never arrange to go see a movie or something like that on a kendo night, but, well, it's not my number one priority at this point in my life. Plus many of my weekends between now and July are already booked.

As for Confound's "gripe," I never said I was looking for a "bloody excuse." To quote the JET Program(me) motto, Every Situation Is Different. Perhaps you're simply "living off the avails of the Japanese government" and treat your position more like "babysitting" than a job, but I for one do treat it like a job and devote quite a lot of time to being an ALT. I'm glad that going to practices 8 times a week makes you happy, but I personally prefer to get involved in as many different activities as possible, and kendo is just one of them. Some of you may say I'm not a real kendoka because of this, but then I never claimed I was. I go to practices when I can, try my hardest when I'm there, often do suburi at home on nights when I don't go to practice, and for me that's enough.

Anyway, thanks for the advice everyone. I guess I'll go to practices as much as I can in the next 2 months, take the test, risk getting a grade I don't deserve, and then do my best to bring my kendo up to nidan level in the future (whether or not I pass the grading).

-Rachel

[itazura]

Rachel,

Yes my last word is take the test and be proud of whatever the outcome is.

Certainly you are a kendoka. Everyone has a different level of dedication and insanity associated with this thing we do. Some of are just sicker than others. Jeez what a disease this is. But if it wasn't kendo it would be something else.....

Best wishes to you.

[Paburo]

racheru,

don't take ranks so seriously. a lot of ppl have a higher rank or a rank lower than they 'deserve'.

in my opinion, if your sensei tells you to do it, take it as if he was telling you to do any other exercise in class. and like any other exercise in class, try to do it the best you can.

[nodachi]

You could take the attitude that many have that you grade has no real meaning anyway. One's rank doesn't really matter beyond setting up divisions in tournaments.

So...

Just go and test and see what advice you can get out of the whole process. I know this is recycled comments, but it is good advice. Take it as another chance to get more training and advice.

[Confound]

That is exactly the kind of slack-arse gaijiin attitude that makes it difficult for some teachers to take gaijin students seriously, Reicheru. If you're going to do kendo, do kendo, don't be all namby-panby about it. Don't bother to do the grading if you're not serious about it. What's the point?

<rant>
I am disgustingly sick of hearing at every stinking tournament, from a mother of some kid from a different school, "O yes, so-and-so ALT does kendo at my school too! He/She is so very good!" When I know for a fact that so-and-so ALT was given the present of a shinai, hakama and a keikogi by their school, and has never even gone to practice once, preferring to go to kokubuncho and carouse instead. The worst is when the well-intentioned mother says to me, "So-and-so ALT could really enjoy kendo with you," after I've been roughly smashed to bits by a roku-dan opponent. "You should go to kendo with so-and-so ALT." Yes, and I should also put my hands into a meat grinder.

That said, I do take my job seriously, I'm the coach of the kendo team (none of the teachers at school know anything about it, so it was a default nominiation, my skills aren't that good), I work until about 5 30 or 6 most days. It's just that this particular job is hardly taxing.

</rant>
disgruntled by having to set the record straight once more of the subject of lazy gaijin kendouka in Japan,

c

[PhilMcLaughlin]

confound

I think JET means you are a volunteer - being so angry wont do you any good - chill out and drink more beer ;-) or quit and spend time being happy doing something else

[kendomushi]

Originally posted by Neil Gendzwill

It's a lot different, at least here in Canada. At 4 dan they are expecting a much different type of kendo than before. Also the judges are a lot harsher as 4 dan is considered to be a sort of junior instructor level. The pass rate drops dramatically from earlier tests.

Yes I agree it is very different. Partly for the same reason you state Neil, you are considered a junior instructor. And being run by a bunch of old Japanese men, you not only have to demonstrate the skills they want, you have to look good too. Looks like I'll be spending about 250,000 yen at minimum for new bogu before November :(

[reicheru]

Confound,

You do not know me. You have never seen how hard I work in and out of school or the dojo. You have no right to assume that my job isn't taxing, just as much as you have no right to assume that keiko with me would be comparable to putting your hands into a meat grinder. For the record, I bought my own bogu, hakama, and keikogi (before I came to Japan) and shinai (in Japan); the only presents I've received here are a shinai bag and a tenegui. I was NOT accepted right away by my dojo simply because I'm a gaijin; in fact I had to fight pretty hard to gain any amount of respect and it took months before anyone, senseis included, would talk to me. I have indeed been to practices more than "3 or 4 times" during my tenure as a JET, usually at least once a week (in fact I just went to practice this afternoon at one of my junior highs). I know how to hold a shinai, thankyouverymuch. I've been to two high level university gasshuku, and I went to the International Budo Culture Seminar this year. I am NOT "namby-pamby" about kendo, I simply have other interests as well. As for "what's the point" in doing the grading, it would mostly be to show respect to my sensei, who wants me to do it. But I still haven't entirely decided if I'm going to do it, BECAUSE I DO take kendo seriously and don't want to risk being awarded a grade on the basis of my looks rather than my skills.

I have no doubt that your kendo skills are better than mine. I can guarantee that I would be unable to smash you to bits like a 6-dan opponent. However, I would suggest that in the future you avoid making judgments about people you know nothing about.

Rachel

[Ares2907]

Do the grading.

It they award it to you and you don't feel you earned it, then do the work you need to do to live up to it.
Don't spend time agonizing over it, it's really not that important.

[Confound]

I'm only pointing out my pet peeve, which is gaijin who fulfil the stereotype of being 'barely committed'.

I was not referring to you specifically in that post, but rather to an ALT who lives in Sendai, who is very eager to say that they do kendo, but doesn't know a shinai from a keikogi... It irritates me severely.

c

[m_french]

Originally posted by reicheru
Confound,

You do not know me. However, I would suggest that in the future you avoid making judgments about people you know nothing about.

Rachel

That would eliminate over 500 of her 600 some odd posts!:beard:

[Inouye02]

true that m_french...

[Confound]

Hardly.

c

[blur]

Rachel,

I'm confused by you mentioning having such a hard time getting settled due to being gaijin and people barely speaking to you... but in the same breath you're saying that the same type of folks might pass you just because you're female, or just because of your looks? I don't get that - why would they be so dismissive on one hand, but falling all over themselves to give you something you don't think you even deserve on the other?

I would have imagined that you're only going to get the grade if you prove you have the ability to do it. I wouldn't have thought any of these grading guys are going to give a grade out just for the heck of it. Especially if you are gaijin and they are really going to begrudge talking to you, let alone promoting you to second dan.

And, hey, if you get the grade, whether you've trained 1, 3 or 7 days a week, ultimately it doesn't matter anyway.

It'd be like Tiger Woods getting all apologetic and saying, "I didn't really deserve that..." for putting a hole in one during a month where he hasn't practiced to the extent of other months.

I mean, you can still agonise over it, but the bottom line would be that you did enough to achieve the grade and, in the absence of anyone saying that a grade is only valid when backed by "x" amount of training, this can't be debated in a logical manner anyway!

In a "worst case scenario" where you got the grade but truly didn't feel deserving, perhaps this would be an impetus to train again like you used to?

-Rob

[Hai_hai]

Reicheru,
Are you attractive? Maybe you may pass your test based on looks.

Confound,
You are an American in the JET programme? Are you fluent in Japanese?

[Inouye02]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Confound
[B]Hardly.

Oh Hell No !! Confound at a loss for words ? what is happening here.

[Confound]

Confound is Canadian. (Confound also frequently refers to herself in the third person.)

Allow me to make that more simple for those in the comic book generation: Wolverine is Canadian, that's Wolverine, from the X-Men. (Superman was also drawn by a Canadian, but no one remembers that.) I also smoke cigars, not unlike Wolverine. Unfortunately, I don't have retractable claws, though they would have come in handy on many occasions.

As for my Japanese, it is good enough to watch anime (except Legend of Galactic Heroes and war oriented series, there are too many technical or political words), and to talk to people about everyday matters. I am not able to sustain a conversation about economics, or other things that I'd prefer to talk about in English, nor is the newspaper comprehensible to me. It's survival Japanese. There were no opportunities to study at university.

My mistakes with kanji are legendary, just check out the thread about hiki-tsuki. That was rather amusing.

c

[kendokamax]

oh confound u know Legend of Galactic Heroes ....! cool

[reicheru]

I'm confused by you mentioning having such a hard time getting settled due to being gaijin and people barely speaking to you... but in the same breath you're saying that the same type of folks might pass you just because you're female, or just because of your looks? I don't get that - why would they be so dismissive on one hand, but falling all over themselves to give you something you don't think you even deserve on the other?


You're right, Blur, it sounds pretty contradictory the way I phrased it! I guess I meant that at first people in my club seemed to think it was so amazing that a gaijin was doing kendo at all, that they didn't bother paying attention to *how* I was doing kendo -- and that's the same issue I fear may come up at the shinsa. In some ways Confound was right -- I think the club moms probably were indeed boasting about having a gaijin in their kids' dojo right from the beginning, even though they had no idea whether or not I could hold a shinai. My sensei and sempai pretty much dismissed anything I did; if I did ask them in broken Japanese about something they would just smile and say "bery goo," without ever having really looked. I remember very clearly the first criticism I received from any of the three sensei at my dojo -- one of them corrected the angle at which I was striking during kirikaeshi, maybe two months after I joined the dojo. I was thrilled, because they were finally starting to take me seriously.

Anyway, by now I've overcome most of that in my own dojo, partly because I speak a lot more Japanese now but mostly because people have just gotten used to me and now see me as any other club member. These days I even have 14-year-olds offering me advice! I don't know the sensei on the grading panel though, so my sensei's "reassurance" that they'd go easy on me because I'm gaijin made me pretty uncomfortable. Hopefully that won't happen though -- hopefully I'll only get a 2-dan ranking if I really deserve it. But even if it doesn't happen that way, I guess it will just be a matter of time before I get my kendo up to that level anyway...

:) Rachel

[kendomushi]

I'm not aware of how things work in other areas Rachel, but in nishi-tokyo, I have only seen people pass who deserved to. I have seen judges make groups repeat kata over and over until they get it right, then spend 45 minutes berating their performance, but if they got it right before the judges patience wore out, they passed.
Pass rates through 3-dan are pretty high to begin with.
I'm sure you will do fine on your merits, not on your being a gaijin.
:)

[blur]

Originally posted by reicheru
Hopefully that won't happen though -- hopefully I'll only get a 2-dan ranking if I really deserve it. But even if it doesn't happen that way, I guess it will just be a matter of time before I get my kendo up to that level anyway...

:) Rachel

Precisely :) Here's hoping it works the way you want it to, first time. If not, no stress, you know you'll make there anyway, so just roll with it & remember that there are a lot of people not in Japan who would love the chance you have, so seize it with both hands and make the most of it anyway :)

[Hai_hai]

bery goo is my favorite snack.