Announcement Announcement Module
Collapse
No announcement yet.
Missing: Higgs boson. Big Reward. Page Title Module
Move Remove Collapse
X
Conversation Detail Module
Collapse
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Missing: Higgs boson. Big Reward.

    Dear CERN,
    Thank you for finding my missing Higgs boson today. I must have dropped it there in Switzerland eons ago while finishing some touch up work on the Alps. I always knew I left it somewhere in THIS universe but just couldn't remember where (must getting old), so when I heard you found it, I was hoping it might be returned. Now that I know where I left it, though, I think I'll let you play with it awhile and see what you can do with it. Should be fun watching what you guys find out.
    Eternally Yours,
    God

  • #2
    Dear god (we at CERN dropped the capital 'G' sometime ago)

    Thank you for your interest in the Higgs boson or 'god partical', which we named after you, a fictitious character, since it's discovery would be another nail in you coffin.

    Thank you for letting us 'play with it' , you patronising g*t, we know you didn't drop it when you were 'finishing the alps....' because we also know they were made by seismic and tectonic forces . In fact we've known you didn't make the Universe or anything in fact, even from ancient times-

    Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
    Then he is not omnipotent.
    Is he able, but not willing?
    Then he is malevolent.
    Is he both able and willing?
    Then whence cometh evil?
    Is he neither able nor willing?
    Then why call him God?

    Epicurus (c. 341-270 BCE)

    So we suggest you disappear, again, and don't rear your unpleasant face, even when we could really do with your help like during Tsunami disasters, famine, pestilence etc and let us get on with doing our thing without the guilt, fear and false-hope you tend to invoke in us. More and more of us are growing up now and like the tooth fairy and Father Christmas, we know you are a human construct invented to make us feel a bit securer in this uncertain world of the X-Factor and The Voice (more proof you don't exist). In the event you decide to hang around, like a bad smell, remember we have a large hadron collider capable of producing high energy particles which we'd be happy to use to find out if they can be used as a cure for constipation.

    Respectfully, yours

    Humanity

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by yoda-waza View Post
      Eternally Yours,
      God

      Lederman said he gave it the nickname "the God particle" because [...] but added that a second reason was because "the publisher wouldn't let us call it the Goddamn Particle, though that might be a more appropriate title, given its villainous nature and the expense it is causing."
      God particle.


      You may call yourself God because one of your publisher minions changed the text but we all know who you really are.

      Comment


      • #4
        The Higgs Bosun is the only visible and particular manifestation of an invisible force field that permeates space binding the universe on a molecular level. Science Today


        It is an energy field created by all living things it surrounds and penetrates us. It binds the galaxy together. By Obi Wan Kenobi


        Now lets see them invent the lightsaber

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Bailemor View Post
          Now lets see them invent the lightsaber
          Now that's proper research!

          Comment


          • #6
            Now that's a step towards the modernization of kendo that I wouldn't mind seeing!

            Comment


            • #7
              "Don't be too proud of this technological nightmare you've created,
              They are as nothing compared to the power of the force"
              D. Vader

              Comment


              • #8
                I think beginners will still have to start with a boku-light sabre and move on to a mogi-light sabre before the shin-light sabre. Only the highest level should train with a pure light sabre.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Peter West View Post
                  I think beginners will still have to start with a boku-light sabre and move on to a mogi-light sabre before the shin-light sabre. Only the highest level should train with a pure light sabre.
                  Will these light-sabres be available in varying wattages.........?/
                  If someone were to have an energy-saving version........ would it take a while to 'warm up'..........
                  If someone comes at me with a 60 watt - - then I want to be holding a 500 watt halogen beast!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    As long as it's not incandescent it's ok in the EU.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by dillon View Post
                      As long as it's not incandescent it's ok in the EU.
                      Not necessarily, we all have our national laws and regulations too. Halogen is fine, neon is less restricted.

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X