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  • Afraid to return

    Hi, I'm new here.
    This may sound kinda stupid. But I need ur advices.
    I was in kendo for about a year or two. But then, I started to feel afraid to it. I think it's because i'm afraid of making mistakes like fell down, say the wrong word, etc.
    Now, i felt that i miss those things. the thrill of facing ur opponent, of the exercise, and many other things.
    i want to return, but i was afraid. i cant tell why...

  • #2
    Everybody goes through this at some point early on in kendo so you're not alone. We all get a little self-conscious and begin worrying about how others perceive us, especially since it's just you and your opponent out there. For me, that's what I like the most about kendo; it forces you to face your fears and be better than you were the day before. Just think of it as one of the first major hurdles you face as a beginning kendoka. If you can push yourself to get back to the dojo and conquer those fears, you'll be all the better for it.

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    • #3
      That's true, we're crossing that path at some points, so you don't have to worry. Afraid of making mistakes is afraid to improve, you don't want that. Making mistakes are often good as long as your intention is to do the right thing. If you keep running from it, you'll never overcome it.

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      • #4
        A Japanese proverb goes something like, "Fall down 7 times, get up 8" - as in life, and as you' ve written, it's about not giving up and IS about going for it. As Kendo still attracts you, try it again. You are lucky: many people spend their lives in boredom. Good luck!

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        • #5
          The hardest thing is always stepping through the door. In the vast majority of cases, people will be more than happy to see 'old' students return, regardless of their level.

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          • #6
            thanks

            Oh my god... ahahaha... i almost cried when i read this.
            thank you so much for ur words.
            i'll definitely return to kendo. i'm still a bit scared. but i'll try my best to improve. i'll become strong, and face my fear.
            thanks a lot u guys

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            • #7
              You will make mistakes, look stupid do things you wish you hadn't. What is important is not the mistakes you make but what you learn from them, how you use your mistakes to improve.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by red.hydrangea17 View Post
                Oh my god... ahahaha... i almost cried when i read this.
                thank you so much for ur words.
                i'll definitely return to kendo. i'm still a bit scared. but i'll try my best to improve. i'll become strong, and face my fear.
                thanks a lot u guys
                Good to hear that.
                By the way, since we're from the same country, where will you train?

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by red.hydrangea17 View Post
                  Oh my god... ahahaha... i almost cried when i read this.
                  thank you so much for ur words.
                  i'll definitely return to kendo. i'm still a bit scared. but i'll try my best to improve. i'll become strong, and face my fear.
                  thanks a lot u guys
                  Good to hear that! I was out of Kendo for 4 years or so, and yes, the hardest part in my experience was walking back into the dojo. Keep your head high and do your best!

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                  • #10
                    I get scared almost everyday train because I know there is a good chance that:

                    a) I'm gonna screw up
                    b) I'm going to be tested to the limit of my focus, stamina, and spirit.
                    c) It's kendo and it's not meant to be easy.

                    I think that this nervousness only lasts until I get through the door of the dojo. Then it's time to train. I got my ass kicked tonight, just on basics and suburi, but was too busy "doing" to be nervous. We had a special practice for the upcoming shiai.

                    Like a poster above said, I think most Sensei will be happy to have you. Kendo has a pretty high attrition rate. Go for it man! I took 10 months off with a torn Achilles, and my sensei we're really happy to see me back, not to mention accommodating.

                    Then we had beer keiko. I mean real beer keiko. And soju keiko. In fact, I'm doing a bit of drunk posting right now, as I bus it home! Of course you should come back! Go for it! *Hic*. *burp*.

                    Seriously though, I hope you come back. I know it's tough, but the fact that you're asking about it suggests to me that you've got the drive to follow through.

                    Damn, I need to drink some water.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by FastKendo View Post
                      Good to hear that.
                      By the way, since we're from the same country, where will you train?
                      Well, apparently i'm still searching. So i don't know yet. And i'm still trying to find the time to train, since my schedule is really full.

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                      • #12
                        Its nice that you decided to keep training
                        I wouldnt consider myself as a total beginner anymore, but since I recently moved to a bigger dojo with real sensei, I find myself making really stupid mistakes all the time and its always really embarrassing.. But thats how we learn not to suck so badly

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                        • #13
                          I used to ride horses. Not this trail riding stuff but dressage. My teacher once said: If you don't fall off the horse every now and then you're not trying/learning...oh, and when you do fall off.. get back on.

                          I used to downhill ski (not very well), my instructors there said "If you're not falling you're not improving"

                          On Chess Gary Kasparov former world champion said:
                          "Setbacks and losses are both inevitable and essential if you're going to improve and become a good, even great, competitor. The art is in avoiding catastrophic losses in the key battles."

                          The point is failure is part of growth. Regardless of what you do try to succeed, be prepared to fail, and use those failures as a springboard to your later successes. Overcoming the fear of failure is part of the growth kendo is supposed to cultivate.
                          Now get back on that horse, kick your boots back into your bindings, and get back to the dojo.

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                          • #14
                            I have a friend that says the same than you, she is afraid of comming back since she has missed lots of kendo and always finds an excuse not to co train each day even thou she could.

                            the bad part is that she has a bogu that belongs to the dojo. I really think that the bogu could be actually being used to some of the guys that needs it, but Im not quite sure about telling her to return it, I think is the best choice but girls are weird and by some irrelevant and illogic reason it might hurt her feelings. I really dont find it important, I mean, is the lesser evil to tell her to return her bogu but for some reason noone has told her that yet even thou everyone agrees with it. from that I could deduce that they may know something that I dont, and thats the only reason I havent told her.

                            I really want her to return the bogu, but I also dont want to screw this up as I (for some reason) usually do when I deal with people.

                            any ideas? this question especially goes to the girl that started this thread. what if one of your sempais tell you to give up your bogu?? (well I assume thet your bogu is yours, but lets think that is loaned from the dojo)

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                            • #15
                              If I were you, I'll tell her to back to the dojo since he already has the bogu, if not, I'll tell her "perhaps that bogu would be more useful for someone else."

                              But I'm a man anyway..

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