Behaving Ourselves

[kanyil]

I travel quite a bit and have trained at different dojos at the same time as well as visited quite a few dojos. I try to follow the following simple rules:

(1) In a dojo, proper etiquette it's what the kancho / resident sensei / the most senior person(s) running the dojo says. When in doubt, ask or shut up and take the most polite approach.

(2) If someone else seems out of line, see rule 1. If nothing's done it might be that the behaviour is not example setting, but tolerated anyways due to existing relationships or other reasons (the dojo in question might be a more relaxed social dojo, for example). When in doubt, ask (only if appropriate) or shut up and take the most polite approach.

(3) When visiting other dojos, remember what's proper depends on the dojo. Some dojos are strict while others are much more relaxed. When visiting another dojo, most visitors should refrain from commenting on what's acceptable unless invited to do so (on anything, including etiquette and kendo). It's not your dojo. See rule 1 and 2. When in doubt, ask or shut up and take the most polite approach.

Do your own kendo. Don't worry so much about others.

[Jonathan]

When the disconnect between your expectations and what is considered acceptable behavior has grown sufficient enough to become a distraction to the training, and the people who are supposed to be in authority are unable or unwilling to address it, there are two possible solutions. Change your expectations, or change your environment. Which course of action is most appropriate is up to you to decide.

I recently left a school as a result of endemic lack of respect that had gone unaddressed. I hope it is the last time I need to do so.

[Big One]

I've never experienced that kind of distraction. Is your expectation too high? Some people are really quite unbearable even for a thing that is ignored by other.

[Jonathan]

In my case, perhaps they were. However, I hold certain convictions strongly, and while I'll respect a given person's decision to run things as they see fit, I don't necessarily have to be party to it.

[Maro]

If you're not in the Sempai group, it's not your place to chase things up. Simple as.

[Jonathan]

And if you are?

[Maro]

And if you are?

You talk to the Sensei privately first.

Were you?

[Jonathan]

Yup. Familiar with the "chain of command". No action taken, so ultimately had to vote with my feet.

Obviously this is a slightly different situation than the original post, but like they say the dojo isn't a democracy. If things are not workable, either they change, you change, or somebody leaves.

[Maro]

That's what I did.

It doesn't matter where you study, if it's not working out, it's unlikely to get better. Besides. I'm doing better now than before and enjoying my training more.

[katana1080]

This may sound sarcastic and off topic but does yawning at a shiai count as disrespectful?

[b8amack]

This may sound sarcastic and off topic but does yawning at a shiai count as disrespectful?

Ha ha, I did this last month during the opening ceremonies. My teammate called me on it, so I think in that case, yes. So embarrassing.