Fake Martial Arts...wow.

[Phorest]

I saw these posted on the JCCC Kendo forums and just had to have a good laugh. Check out this "swordsmanship" from "one of today's top martial artists"... Rick Tew.

It doesn't get much funnier than this!!

http://www.tewryu.com/sword_sparring.html

http://www.winjitsu.com/sword_form.html

http://www.tewryu.com/sword_angles.html

http://www.tewryu.com/sword_drills.html

Wow. I don't know whether to find this funny, or tragic?

[saki_wooah]

man... this is sick

Training Today's Ninja - Rick Tew's Martial Science and Tew Ryu Ninjitsu is your source for up to date total warrior information and training. American Ninjitsu systems upgraded to a non-traditional program of martial arts. What Ninjutsu wants to be - the Martial Science is your solution for becoming a ninja based on reality or what we call a "Total Warrior" Tired of ninjutsu traditionalists that hide behind scrolls and names? Welcome to the arena where you are the leader and the student is once again the most important aspect of the Martial Arts.

Ninja based on reality??? who's sick enough to walk around in a ninja suit in America???

College of Martial Science
Martial Arts Camp - CMS, College of Martial Science in California. Martial Arts, Adventure and Personal Growth. 3-18 month program to bring you to instructor status in the Martial Science. Teach Martial Arts for a living - join today.

would like to try Kendo v.s. Martial Science Instructor...

*ippon for kendo*

why going to the college of martial science? Train at home with a baseball bat and old furniture that you can destroy.



This is sooo funny! This is not martial art at all! I wonder if he started by doing things like shinai.org....

[Phorest]

I hadn't even noticed that part Saki...

What Ninjutsu wants to be

Wow. Thats bold. I hope a real ninja doesn't read that and decide to show Mr. Tew what real Ninjutsu is all about.

[JSchmidt]

Well, we can't have a ninja thread without this.

Jakob (who's going to flip out and kill people)

[Phorest]

Of course we can't. And I would be afraid that the real Ninja from the hate-mail section doesn't pay Mr. Tew a visit as well. Heh heh.
But..this isn't a ninja thread! Its a...laugh at the guy who thinks he knows stuff about swordsmanship thread. Yup.

[Critical_Bill]

omg omg omg!

idiots! curse the weirdass ninja movies of the 80s!!
not only were they really really bad and infuriating, they spawned
a breed of..of....well the evidence is right there.. i wanna cry!
i'm gonna have to dress up as a pirate and smack some ninja boys heeheh

[Blah]

my eyes bleed

[nodachi]

Has anyone actually had an opportunity to meet one of these McDojo sensei and whoop their booty in front of their students or to discredit them and ruin their farce?

I think that would be really fun. Granted, I am not good yet, but if one of you folks have had a chance to do just that, please share the story.

[Haowen]

If people really buy into that, I'm going to start selling my own personal brand of kung-fu pills. Take one a day and you'll be a real ninja! (And randomly flip out and kill people).

[Phorest]

I agree with nodachi 100%.
If you were to do this you would win the "Kendo World Kenshi of the Year" award. It doesn't exist...but if you pulled off something that amazing well, I would create it. And, if you video taped it you could have that for 2 years in a row.

[Confound]

I'll say one thing, Mr. Tews has a monopoly on looking like a stupid reject from the backstreet boys. He looks like he's trying to audition for the ninja-sword-dancing edition of the latest boy band. Maybe he is trying to build an army of brainless, bleached automatons who will take over the world and force us all to listen to their awful cheesy pop music, with bad guitar solos.

c

[stevemcgee99]

That's one of the coolest sites I've ever been to. I laugh out loud over and over.

[etherknot]

Well I only needed to see the first clip.
It's pretty bad. But there are a LOT of people on the Internet like this. Just go read alt.martial-arts in USEnet. Trust me, stuff like this gets old real quick


Needless to say, a real ninja wouldn't attend these lessons or order any of the product. It's not in their nature to draw attention to the fact that they are ninjas. It's part of the invisibility.


I did however get a chuckle from:

Rick Tew's Martial Science Home Study Program
Put away the Ninja films and pop in a HSP tape and learn the Martial Science at home.* Easy to learn step by step training to teach you everything the martial arts has to offer.


Be sure to watch the "How-to-Seppaku In 5 Easy Steps" video included free with every purchase!

[stk]

must... wash.. brain..

[nodachi]

The big question is... does this guy know he is full of pooh (which means he is a shrewd business man/con man for tricking people into giving money) or does he think he is actually teaching (which means he is just plain nuts)?