McDojo's

[Denker]

Hi,

I'm going to be putting a spoof-type movie together, and it's going to be centered around two McDojo's. I was wondering if you would be so kind as to share some commonly known, *cough,* deficiencies that McDojo's have. Ridiculous waza, black belt in seven days... etc.

Thank you very much,

Matt

[Richmond-san]

I have a good one, from a little McDojo called Budo Ryu: Classical school of kenjutsu. There are no actual sparring bouts, everything and I mean everything is coreographed form kill bill, the last samurai or any on of those Toshiro Mifune samurai flicks... It's really sad. Plus they said the specialized in the yagu instead of Yagyu school and for that error I will not forgive.

[Light Samurai]

The other school can be made up of wanna-be ninjas, where they attempt to lift trees, and the tree falls on them, and they die Something like that

[LarsCW]

A mate of me who lives in Cali got his 10 year old daughter on jiu jiutsu classes at a (what I think prolly is a) McDojo.

He bought an iaito earlier this year because he loved the way it looked and had an accident with it when he wanted to show it and it wasn't place properly in the saya it slid out and he cut his finger resulting in 8 stitches and he still haven't got all senses back in that finger. Due to this he didn't put his daughter on the weapons training of the school where these 10 year olds are swinging bokken.

I have been trying for 6 months now to get him to a proper dojo but he's stubborn and keeps putting it infront.
Eventhou he doesn't goto a dojo he isn't training with it either but has it as ornament currently but a bit late.

[Kaoru]

A mate of me who lives in Cali got his 10 year old daughter on jiu jiutsu classes at a (what I think prolly is a) McDojo.

He bought an iaito earlier this year because he loved the way it looked and had an accident with it when he wanted to show it and it wasn't place properly in the saya it slid out and he cut his finger resulting in 8 stitches and he still haven't got all senses back in that finger. Due to this he didn't put his daughter on the weapons training of the school where these 10 year olds are swinging bokken.

I have been trying for 6 months now to get him to a proper dojo but he's stubborn and keeps putting it infront.
Eventhou he doesn't goto a dojo he isn't training with it either but has it as ornament currently but a bit late.

Hey LarsCW-san,

Feel free to dig through my posts. Just look in my profile and click on posts by Kaoru, and find the ones where I explain why a person should attend a real proper dojo. Maybe if he sees some of my posts on why, he'll get it. I HATE it when people get hurt because they goofed off thinking they can play with swords unsupervised with no training. So, feel free to waggle some of my posts in his face. Tell him I want him to read them. Or better yet, do you want me to write one up 'specially for him? I will. Just tell me, and I'll see if I can convince him for you. Seriously! I am really sorry he got hurt.

Kaoru

[Ninjujinkaku]

Kaoru why would his friend care about your posts if his friend obviously doesnt take iaido seriously and practices byhimself?

[LarsCW]

Hey LarsCW-san,

Feel free to dig through my posts. Just look in my profile and click on posts by Kaoru, and find the ones where I explain why a person should attend a real proper dojo. Maybe if he sees some of my posts on why, he'll get it. I HATE it when people get hurt because they goofed off thinking they can play with swords unsupervised with no training. So, feel free to waggle some of my posts in his face. Tell him I want him to read them. Or better yet, do you want me to write one up 'specially for him? I will. Just tell me, and I'll see if I can convince him for you. Seriously! I am really sorry he got hurt.

Kaoru

Thank you Kaoru-san,

I promised him that I will make sure he will get class at a propper dojo when he is ready to get class. He has never been swinging the sword, it was just him not putting the sword back properly into the saya. He really got his punnishment physically and mentally. I have been making jokes at him about his stuppid action. I would like your help when the time comes to get him to an iaido dojo then i'll give him a nice bokken for his Bday:=)

[LarsCW]

Kaoru why would his friend care about your posts if his friend obviously doesnt take iaido seriously and practices byhimself?

He doesn't practise by himself. He bought the sword and told me he wanted to learn to use it. He made sure he knew how to clean it and accidently didn't put it back correctly in the saya and then when he wanted to show it it slid out

[Anime12478]

There was one Tae Kwon Do place that I was went to just to observe so my friend could inquire about classes. For one thing, quite a few of the belts were tied wrong and their technique was just very innefective...and this is coming from the advanced students.

This is the killer! I don't remember exactly what he asked, but he asked the students a question along the lines, "How do you punch?" The reply was, "I will show you SIR!" while they were punching. It's one of those things that I could only do it best if I could show you myself, but this is the best that I could do for now.

[Denker]

The other school can be made up of wanna-be ninjas, where they attempt to lift trees, and the tree falls on them, and they die Something like that

Uh... This is a low, I should say nonexistent, budget movie. Having lightsabers cost me an arm in a leg, so let's be kind :P

Wow, I actually had the idea to tie my Gi and Hakama completely stupidly . . . but I'm not sure I want to do that to my Gi. Now that I've learned how to correctly pronounce kouryu, I'll make sure that in the dialog, the McDojo trainees massacre the words.

Why are you hijacking my thread Kaoru? irate: Just kidding, but seriously, I'm sure YOU have some good stories or facts about McDojo's that I could rip off-- make use of!

- Matt

[Richmond-san]

okay, just about an hour ago, I was leaving my last class and someone I knew came up to me and asked if I was going to the Star Wars premier, I said yah. I turned around and asked the same question, his reply was also yes but he was going to the theater in the city about 15min. from here. (his reasons were why this story is applicable to this thread.) He said he was bringing his lightsaber(toy) so he could personally show his might andkick the ass of everyone else there, how could he do this I asked? His reply goes as follows: He holds a brown belt in kendo and iaijutsu, as well as a black belt in tai chi, and karate. I asked him the name of his dojo(as anyone would) and all he could say was it was a small dojo in the midwest (that teaches all of these from one sensei)... And the sensei was the best part... he is only 35 but holds a 7 dan soke (his words) in both kendo and iaijutsu, has a 9th degree black belt in karate as well as being a master of Tai Chi... And this kids favorite story to tell about his martial arts experience is when they where trained in tai chi to only target the throat and the crotch...

It sounds made up I know... Like there is no way these words could have actually been honestly spoken by a real person save Gatsu-san...

But I swear on my word of honor and all I consider holy it is the truth... and it scares me.

[Denker]

You sir, have made my night. And here I thought that I'll be able to choreograph the best lightsaber scene ever since I'm a beginner in Kendo. I am Beginner Musashi! Able to master Kendo in a single class! Hiiiiiyaaaa! Obviously that kid has miles on me.

He holds a brown belt in kendo you say? Drat, I've only worked my way up to Indigo

[Richmond-san]

I just couldn't resist telling you guys and gals... (darkside burgeoning)... I hate him.

[IZA]

Hey LarsCW-san,

Feel free to dig through my posts. Just look in my profile and click on posts by Kaoru, and find the ones where I explain why a person should attend a real proper dojo. Maybe if he sees some of my posts on why, he'll get it. I HATE it when people get hurt because they goofed off thinking they can play with swords unsupervised with no training. So, feel free to waggle some of my posts in his face. Tell him I want him to read them. Or better yet, do you want me to write one up 'specially for him? I will. Just tell me, and I'll see if I can convince him for you. Seriously! I am really sorry he got hurt.

Kaoru

Its really very a sad sight to see people presuming to know kendo or kenjutsu, running around with bokken doing bokken sparring. sometimes its very an amusing sight to see (forgive me kaoru-san , i know you dont like it), some poeple just to blind to see that last samurai and doin kendo or kenjutsu are not the same deal. Well i hope some of these people will find thier way, one day they might meet and learn things from a qualified teacher- that would be very good for them and i will be most happy for them. the sad thing is if one persist bokken sparring is actually beneficial. most terrible when some of these guys combine tag game and kenjutsu with 8 or 9 year old players.

To some extent when something happens, then people tend to generalise that all practitioner ar doing that...so difficult to explain since its most of the populace doesnt understand the art. But thats the way life is - Cant really live without them. i think, in this world-there are always people like that.

Denker-san are you planning a kung pow like movie, ill be waiting for that- promise.

[senki-kendo-jos]

Dear god!! I remember hearing about a dojo in the UK from a sensei of mine where the pupils had to do hours of press ups etc (and bear in mind that this is kendo, not karate) before putting their hakama on back to front, along with their coloured belt sticking out of the side and doing a very strange approxomation of suburi with their legs wide open in what looked like the French-Lavatory-Squat (if anyone has seen Red Dwarf's Smeg Up's they'll know what I mean!). They then put on bogu in the most imaginative way sensei had ever seen and were put through hell by the "sempai" (and I use that term loosely here boys!). The weirdest bit was that they always hit the floor with their shinai before cutting!! During jigeiko they seemed to aim everywhere but the targets and when they tsukii'd sensei in the shoulder he whipped the guy. The "sempai" gave him a hard time so he courteously wiped the dojo floor with the "sempai's" ass. The "grand master" as they called him had a verbal go at sensei, but wouldn't fence as, apparently, the "mortal injury" he had picked up while learning eight styles of sword combat from a hermit monk in Japan was playing up!! CLASSIC!!

(btw, if anyone remembers this story better than I can feel free to change it... I've only heard it about 8th hand!!)